Bathing in aftersun
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“It’s far too hot for you to be wearing that, it’s designed for cool water.” said Mr S rather wisely given that the temperature was 36C (97F) and rising and I was wearing a long sleeved thermal rash vest (you know, the sort of swimsuit-type material tops surfers wear to block the sun).
“I’m ok, anyway, I want to keep the sun off me.”
This was in the car.
Once we got to the beach, I found a nice shady spot and stayed in it all day. I popped into the water once, with the rashie, and then headed back to the shade where the rashie came off again.
We left the beach, again, me wearing the thermal rashie (ok, it was a bit hot, but I was not wanting to get the sun), secure in the knowledge that unlike the three British girls on the beach who had, with their once rather beautiful porcelain skin, been crisping in the direct sun, all day, I would not be the colour of a lobster. It may have even been me who said under my breath to Mr S, “Yeah, but since when has bright red been an attractive skin colour?” when we overheard one declaring, “We need to get some colour before we go back” as she tugged her bikini bottoms further up her behind.
As the seatbelt clicked into place, searing pain spread through my thigh. In a rather ungraceful (even more so than wearing the definitely unflattering rashie) move I unclicked, jumped out the car and pulled my trousers down (don’t worry, nobody was around - being in Egypt for this long gives you a bit of a sixth sense for workmen loitering behind bushes near the beach etc) and my thigh was glowing. Then I felt heat from my décolletage and shoulders.
Two days later and I am still bathing in oodles of aftersun, moving awkwardly and not leaving the house so I can escape the torture that is wearing ladies’ undergarments on scorched skin.
The only explanation for my metamorphosis into an energy efficient heating source (Come and get it! Come and get it! Eco heat! Limited time offer! Open to highest bidder (must cover costs of skin cancer later).) is that the shade was in fact pseudo shade. The umbrella above me was made of slatted wood rather than one solid piece. The small gaps in between meant that sun was actually on me, and I didn’t realise.
Sorry, must dash. The last inch of aftersun has been soaked up, off to slather on some more.
3 Comments
1.
Expatmum commented on June 02, 2008 at 9:20 pm
Ow, ow, ouch! It’s just hotting up here and although I would love to get a nice lightly golden tan, I know it’s not even worth trying. Could it be that your rashie isn’t as SPF as it’s supposed to be? There have been a number of news pieces here in the States about false claims.
2.
trailing grouse commented on June 03, 2008 at 7:20 am
Hi there! Actually the rashie doesn’t claim to have an SPF, but it’s about 5mm thick because of the thermal layer inside, very dark grey and completely opaque, so unlikely it was that. I do wonder though, about some of the SPF claims, particularly of flimsy white rashies.
Oh, what’s that I see? SPF lawsuits on the horizon..?
3.
Almost American commented on June 04, 2008 at 3:07 am
Ouch! I feel for you! I remember getting badly burned one time when I was in the south of France and wanting to spend the night stark naked, standing up, so that NOTHING was touching my skin anywhere. I had already booked to go on a daytrip the next day, and whenever we had to be in the sun I scurried as fast as I could to the nearest spot of shade, but it didn’t help. I used to be a sun-worshipper but have given it up since my dad got skin cancer on his face
Hope you feel better soon!